The Best-Kept Wellness Secret All Women Should Know

How robust of a sex life you have (or don’t have) isn’t usually a topic patients bring up during their annual visits to the doctor’s office. According to women’s wellness brand plusOne’s proprietary studies 2021 and 2023, only about one in three women with male partners feel comfortable speaking to their doctor about their satisfaction in the bedroom. Felice Gersh, MD, board-certified OB-GYN, integrative gynecologist and member of the plusOne Wellness Collective, says there’s good reason for that: “In most cases in the conventional medical world, the allotment of time for a visit is so short and problem-focused that patients are discouraged from bringing up ‘ancillary’ issues, like sexual wellness,” says Dr. Gersh.

That’s why Dr. Gersh takes a more holistic approach to her patient visits. She draws from a large therapeutic toolbox — one that includes conventional pharmaceuticals, surgical procedures, and devices — but also focuses on the various lifestyle issues and interventions (like nutrition, fitness, sleep optimization, bodywork, and nutraceuticals) that are often neglected in the traditional medical world.

“In most medical practices, sexuality, along with nutrition and lifestyle, sort of falls into an area of ‘We’re not going to get into it,’” says Dr. Gersh. “With my patients, I do a review of systems where I ask about different organ systems, and then I get to the genital-urinary tract and directly ask, ‘Do you have any concerns about your sex life? Are you able to have an orgasm? If you have a male partner, is he still able to have erections?’ In most cases, the topic doesn’t come up if I don’t bring it up.”

For many women, talking about orgasms isn’t just awkward with your doc: According to plusOne’s 2021 and 2023 proprietary studies, 56% of women with male partners are embarrassed to talk about their sexual pleasure with their own partners. The good news is, it’s never too late to care for the beautiful body you’re in, and the more in touch you are with your own desires, the more you’re going to want your partner to share in your excitement: PlusOne’s Intimate Wellness Survey found that women who use a personal pleasure product, like their Private Pleasure Vibe, are significantly more open to voicing their own needs and desires to their partners. Since most partners can’t read our minds, you’ve got to know what you want and then ask for want you want, so you can get what you want.

It’s time to stop shying away from female sexual wellness and initiate more fruitful conversations around the topic to help you live your most vibrant life. Your intimate wellness matters just as much as your overall happiness does, and so does using your voice.

Why it’s important to have conversations about intimate wellness

For women in the peri/menopause phase of life, a problem like vaginal dryness or low libido is often discussed in a medical situation, but the conversation is short-lived. “It’s like, ‘We’ll give you some vaginal estrogen, end of story, next topic,’” says Dr. Gersh. And the back-and-forth typically focuses only on the irritating issues you’re experiencing.

But there’s also so much to be celebrated when it comes to your activities under the sheets at any age, whether or not you’re coupled up. Engaging in conversations (with yourself, your partner, or even your doctor) about intimate wellness isn’t just about breaking taboos; it’s about reclaiming your agency over a crucial aspect of your well-being. These discussions pave the way for self-discovery, fostering a deeper connection with your body and empowering you to make informed choices.

Celebrating the trials and triumphs of arousal shouldn’t be limited to the confines of a doctor’s office or during pillow talk with your partner. Swapping personal experiences with other women is the best way to learn about what might work for you, too. If talking about pleasure with your pals makes you feel uncomfortable, you’re not alone: plusOne’s Intimate Wellness Survey found only 47% of women feel comfortable speaking about their own sexual gratification with friends. The good news is, the more you understand what turns you on, the more likely you are to spread the word: The study also found that women who currently use a personal pleasure product like plusOne’s Dual Rabbit Vibrator, are over 30% more likely to feel comfortable swapping sex advice with friends. That’s not surprising, considering 98% of participants in plusOne’s 2023 Consumer Perception Study reported feeling more relaxed after four weeks of vibrator usage.

“There are so many things that go into having a successful sexual life,” says Dr. Gersh, “and using personal pleasure products like vibrators can help you in so many ways from a health standpoint — and also from a mental and emotional standpoint, which in my world, are one.”

Dr. Gersh is a big fan of plusOne’s sexual wellness tools, like the Rose Arouser, and is a firm believer that they can help women optimize their overall health and wellbeing. She’s not just speculating here: according to their 2023 Consumer Perception Study, plusOne found 93% of women reported feeling happier and less irritated after using a pleasure product for just four weeks. If you’ve been seeking a natural way to brighten your day, look no further.

There are a few reasons Dr. Gersh suggests plusOne over other women’s pleasure products. “They’re designed for a woman’s hands and life, so they’re very user-friendly,” she says. “And they give you a lot of variety in terms of the types of pulsing and vibrating at all different levels.” And plusOne vibrators also incorporate silicone into their design, so they’re non-absorbent. “They can be used in the bath because they’re made from waterproof silicone, which is non-porous — so they don’t absorb bacteria, and they’re easy to wash and keep clean.”

Why you should maintain an intimate wellness routine

A thriving sex life doesn’t just feel good in the moment. Having regular orgasms supports your general health, including better immune function, inflammation reduction, and improved gut health, explains Dr. Gersh. Using a pleasure product can also help with sleep: 91% of women who regularly use a vibrator like plusOne’s Vibrating Bullet say they sleep better, and 94% reported feeling less stressed.

Plus, having an orgasm triggers various physiological responses in the body, like contractions in the uterus and vagina, which are akin to a mini Kegel workout. The increased blood flow that arises from orgasms also helps to maintain your overall pelvic health.

There are also biochemical changes in the body during orgasm that involve the release of neurotransmitters and peptides like oxytocin and dopamine. Oxytocin, known as the love bonding hormone, reduces appetite and induces feelings of warmth and happiness. Dopamine, a feel-good neurotransmitter, contributes to stress reduction, better sleep, and potential pain relief. And both are released during a female orgasm, Dr. Gersh explains.

Don’t be afraid to use a vibrator

If you’re new to sex tools or think they’re intimidating, know that there can be a learning curve — but the benefits are well worth the…research. “It’s almost like practice makes perfect,” explains Dr. Gersh. “Using a vibrator helps you learn your erogenous zones. You understand what makes you tick and what works for you, so when you’re getting intimate with your partner, you can help guide them to what works for you.”

And don’t fall for the myth that once you achieve orgasm with a vibrator, nothing else will work, or that you won’t want to have a partner anymore. “Data shows that women who use personal intimate devices like a vibrator and who can achieve orgasms are more prone to wanting to have partner sex, have better partner sex, and are more likely to achieve an orgasm with partner sex,” says Dr. Gersh.

Another perk? Owning a vibrator can be a happy little secret that helps boost your confidence, explains Dr. Gersh. “You can use a vibrator discreetly — and they’re great for those who might’ve grown up in a home where sex was taboo to talk about. Using a vibrator to explore your body, and to help you understand your anatomy, can help you be more comfortable in your skin.”