About a year after Jay Leno was granted a conservatorship over the estate of his wife Mavis, the comedian is opening up about becoming her caretaker. Mavis Leno was diagnosed with dementia some years ago, and by 2024, her attorney told the courts that her condition had progressed to the point that her husband had taken over the finances.
Being a caretaker to a loved one with dementia is not easy, and earlier this week, the former late-night host talked about what the experience has been like for him. During an appearance on In Depth with Graham Bensinger, the host asked about what dealing with his wife’s diagnosis has taught Leno about himself.
“When I got married, you sort of take a vow: ‘Will I live up to this? Or will I be like a sleazy guy if something happens to my wife, I’m out banging the cashier at the mini-mart?'” Leno replied. “No, I didn’t. I enjoy the time with my wife. I go home, I cook dinner for her, watch TV, and it’s OK.”
He remarked that their current routine is not all that different from what it was pre-diagnosis, except now he has some added responsibilities. “It’s basically what we did before, except now I have to feed her and do all those things. But I like it. I like taking care of her,” he added. “She’s a very independent woman, so I like that I’m needed and that I need to be there.”
It’s not always easy, but Leno said that stepping up for his wife has added a new dimension to their relationship. “I think that’s what really defines a marriage,” he said. “That’s really what love is. That’s what you do. I’m glad I didn’t cut and run; I’m glad I didn’t run off with some woman half my age or any of that silly nonsense. I would rather be with her than doing something else.”
When asked why their partnership has been so successful — the Lenos have been married for over four decades — he started with the part that goes without saying: “Obviously, you love each other.” He then reflected on how dating can be particularly challenging for comedians, who work unpredictable schedules, perform at night, and can be on the road for long periods of time.
“I always tell comedians, male or female, if you’re dating someone and they say to you, why do you have to work every night? The relationship’s over.”
He never had that problem with Mavis, though: “My wife never asked me not to do this [or said] why do you have to be on the road? I always took her with me when I could, and we always had a good time. We always had fun.”
Leno said that, even during the tough times, they’re still finding joy. In January, he told the NY Post, “I still make her laugh every day, and that’s always fun. We go back on YouTube — they have all the ‘Headlines’ [segments] that we did over the years. And my wife enjoys those, and it’s like she forgets that she just saw it, so she laughs again at the same jokes. So for a comedian, that’s great.”
As he told Bensinger: “You have to find the humor in it.”
