You know Naomi Watts as the Oscar-nominated actress with roles in projects like Mulholland Drive, 21 Grams, The Watcher, and The Ring, but now this superstar performer also wants to be known as an outspoken advocate for women living their best lives at any age.
In her new book Dare I Say It, she opens up about her personal menopause journey, which began at only 36 years old. Watts, now 56, joined Katie for the latest episode of Next Question, and this dynamic duo had a blast going deep on the physical and emotional ups and downs that come with this time in a woman’s life.
Watch their entire conversation in the video above, and read on for a few of the highlights.
On being open and honest about her experiences with menopause
“When I asked my mom why she didn’t tell me more about menopause, she said, ‘I didn’t have these conversations with you because I never had them with my mother,’ — as if to say there was some code of silence that was agreed upon generation by generation, which is absurd,” Watts told Katie. “Why should we suck it up and suffer? There’s absolutely no reason when treatment is available.”
Watts illustrated how being transparent about these big bodily changes can be for the best by sharing an initially awkward but ultimately sweet moment she had with her husband, actor Billy Crudup, when she’d tried to hide from him that she was wearing an estrogen patch. “I slipped away, not to get in a nice little sexy neglige, but to scrape off my patch,” Watts said. “But being with someone who is understanding and not squeamish, he was not spooked at all. And I was met with compassion and curiosity.” (And Crudup took the opportunity to share an admission of his own — but Watts told Katie she’d leave that part of the story for readers of her book.)
Watts explained that this moment taught her a valuable lesson about the importance of being frank about the effects of menopause.
“We gaslight ourselves. We think this is all gonna be terrible, and we don’t give it a chance,” she said. “If you are owning it and naming it and sharing it with your partner, whoever you’re with, there’s every chance that they might be willing to be helpful, compassionate, or just supportive in ways that we need. So it’s a much better option, I think, to just lean into it.”
On the death of David Lynch, who directed her in Mulholland Drive
Watts told Katie that, before she landed the role in 2001’s Mulholland Drive, she was stuck in a loop of approaching auditions with “shut-down energy” — and things got so dire that her agent said she was presenting herself as “unhireable.” Then she met Lynch, who spent 45 minutes talking with her in the audition room to loosen her up. “And from that day,” she said, “my life changed.”
“I don’t think I would still be living in America if it wasn’t for him,” Watts went on. “I wouldn’t have American children. I would’ve thrown the towel in. I was at that point where I couldn’t have tolerated it any longer if I didn’t have a breakthrough.”
She also shared with Katie what a fantastic environment Lynch created on set — and how she’s feeling about everyone mourning him together.
“He created an environment where not only did you feel safe, but unbelievably creatively charged and at your best. He accessed all the best parts of everyone,” she said. “So that’s the loss that I’m experiencing, but I’m comforted by the joy — if you’ve spent any time reading articles about him over the last week, there’s so much joy that people have experienced through connection with him, whether it’s his films or him personally.”
On the opportunities in Hollywood for actresses over 50
Women have historically been shut out of opportunities on the big screen as they get older, but Watts is thrilled to report that the trend is changing.
“This year, I look at all of the Oscar nominees and Golden Globe nominees, and there’s a litany of women in their fifties telling brilliant stories, sexual stories, stories about aging,” she says.
That includes her longtime pal Nicole Kidman, who’s currently starring in the erotic thriller Babygirl at 57. (Katie said that after seeing Kidman’s performance, “I’ll never look at a glass of milk the same way again.” Watts agreed: “She needs to do a milk ad, for sure.”)
Watts pointed to one specific role of hers that she says encapsulates why she’s so excited by the projects coming her way these days.
“In Feud: Capote vs. The Swans, I got to play the age range of 40 to 63. I am my age, and my face represents that. And what I bring to a story or a character represents that too,” Watts says. “I’ve experienced grief, I’ve experienced loss, I’ve experienced a major breakup, and I felt so much shame about having a broken family, even knowing that my ex and I are both in a happy, healthier relationship and our kids love their new family members. I still feel a sense of failure sometimes. And so that’s the kind of woman I’m going to play.”
