Is This the Most Dramatic “Golden Bachelorette” Episode Yet?

We’ve made it another week in the Bachelor mansion (I say as if I am the one up for elimination every week). Judging from last week’s preview, we’re in for a fun group date, and Chock might be leaving us. Let’s see what actually unfolds.

Golden Bachelorette Week 4 Recap

Chock says in a talking head that he feels for Joan because the night before, she told them she was struggling with the idea of officially moving on her from her late husband. He says that intimate moment brought their relationship up a notch. 

Hopefully he’ll have some time to foster that connection this week during one of the dates.

Speaking of dates, there’s a knock at the door with news of who’s going on the group date: Jonathan, Pascal, Dan, Charles, Gary, Mark, Gil, Chock, and Keith. That means Guy and Jordan are getting one-on-one dates!

The Group Date

The date card said, “Let’s bare it all for love.” Something tells me we’re going to be seeing some skin…

Joining them on the date is Kaitlyn Bristowe, which is great for me because I love Kaitlyn.

She explains that Joan is looking for someone to “light up the room with their personality,” so the men’s stage presence will be put to the test with a performance. And that performance is…a Chippendale’s style show featuring real Chippendale’s dancers. Most of the guys are excited, but Dan is extremely nervous. What, it’s not like you’re going to be dancing half-naked on national television — oh wait.

Actual footage of Dan’s face:

Kaitlyn also adds that this date is in partnership with Stand Up To Cancer to encourage people to “bare it all” and get screenings. A very worthy cause, if we do say so ourselves.

Me seeing The Golden Bachelorette talk about SU2C when I work for Katie Couric Media:

Chock’s response to this scenario? “I’d like to have about three Chardonnays before I do this.” Relatable.

The guys get to choose their costumes, and they range from “Hot for Teacher” (what I’m calling Gary’s professor outfit) to “Sgt. Sexy” (Jonathan’s tiny military costume). 

It’s performance time! 

From my POV, Jonathan was a natural stand-out. Pascal clearly feels himself and is giving it his all. Keith does the Macarena, but makes it sexy? 

Gary gets a nice twerk going. Dan has some fun pirate moves. Charles L. has the cutest dad dance moves. You can tell this isn’t Chock’s cup of tea at all, but he has some fun with it — and he’s got some moves as well! 

That was a lot of fun. But I’m thinking the winner of this challenge isn’t going to be the guy who gives the best lap dance (Jonathan), but who has the most fun with it and brings the most lighthearted energy. 

After the date, Joan reveals that John was diagnosed with cancer on Valentine’s Day. Then she has some one-on-one conversations with the guys. First, Joan tells Chock she really missed him, and she believes she has a future with him, and he agrees. That’s wonderful, don’t get me wrong, but can we just talk about how that conversation started?

Chock: Let’s talk about us. You go first.

He’s not wasting any time…and he’s also big on delegating, it seems.

Keith tells Joan that being a Chippendale’s dancer was his dream when he was 20 and he gives her another private dance. Jonathan gives Joan the gold hotpants he wore during his dance. Gary and Joan FaceTime his son. Mark and Joan talk about their late spouses and how they feel guilty when they try to think about going on dates.

And the winner, and the recipient of the rose, goes to…Chock! Joan says the rose was more about who she has the deepest connection with and less about the actual dancing. Well, then, what was the point of that song and dance? Let us have a moment of silence for all the shirts that were wastefully torn in the making of this date.

Cut to Chock sitting outside crying. He reminds us that his mother was very ill with stage 4 cancer and unfortunately, she passed away that morning. “We knew it was coming, but it doesn’t make it any easier,” he says. Chock has no choice but to go home at this point, which is completely understandable. He first tells the guys about the news, and they’re all very sympathetic and supportive.

This is such a sad situation, but it’s extra poignant because when Joan was on The Golden Bachelor, she had to leave right after she had a really special one-on-one date with Gerry. This feels like history repeating itself: Right after the high of winning the first date rose, Chock has to leave. 

Joan has a one-on-one date with Jordan scheduled, but first, Chock has to tell her his news. They sit on a bench — is that the bench where she broke her news to Gerry? We gotta get rid of this bench. Anyway, Chock says he feels guilty because he wasn’t there when his mom passed, and Joan admits that she understands because when John passed, she was asleep in a different room.

So, sadly, Chock is going to be leaving us. Joan is sad because they had a good connection but she, more than anyone probably, understands what he’s going through. 

Joan and Jordan’s One-on-One 

Well, this isn’t really the ideal start to a date, but Joan powers through anyway. She and Jordan are going ice skating — and not just ice skating: There’s a full winter wonderland set up on the rink. As if ice skating isn’t hard enough, now they have to skate around fake trees and don’t have the edge of the rink to hold onto. Good thing they have helmets. 

Jordan’s so bad at this that Joan has to tow him around. Hey, we like a man who lets the woman take the lead! 

Jordan tells Joan about his divorce. He says there were “some serious breaches of marital trust.” 

It seems every single date on this show is going to come with a surprise musical guest (cool), because REO Speedwagon shows up to sing “Can’t Fight This Feeling.” And Jordan gets the rose. 

Guy’s One-on-One Date 

This date is probably the most low-key of all the dates. We’re at “Joan’s house” (there’s no way really she lives here, right? Doesn’t she live in Maryland?), and they’re going to be cooking baked ziti. I hope this also comes with a special musical guest. 

Guy tells Joan that his marriage ended after 34 years because when their youngest child went away to college, they realized they weren’t happy. They went to couples therapy, and his wife realized she was done with the marriage. Guy gets the date rose, which means I have at least one more week to make Guy’s Girls a thing.

The Cocktail Party

The guys get one more shot to have a solo conversation with Joan before the rose ceremony. 

Joan felt like Pascal wasn’t showing effort, and he says that he didn’t want to be jumping all over her and stepping on people’s feet. 

Jonathan gets Joan a Cheerios box with her name on it. They compare their morning schedules: They’re both early risers, usually waking around 5 or 5:30. Couldn’t be me. 

Mark gives Joan a gift “to remember the fun of this week.” It’s a toy fire engine because his Chippendale’s costume was a sexy firefighter. Keith arranges a makeshift beach picnic out in front of the mansion, and he’s getting tongue-tied, saying things like, “We don’t have a lot of time, but if we had more time, we could continue to talk about the time…” I’m paraphrasing, but it was not good. I’ll chalk it up to nerves, which is cute.

Meanwhile, we literally haven’t heard from Dan all episode, so that’s not a good sign for him.

And, OMG! Chock is back! That was a surprise I honestly didn’t see coming. Guess Joan owes him a date! Chock tells Joan that he’s had armor up his whole life and he needs to let it down and open up his heart, which he’s going to need help with. We have a feeling she can definitely help with that.

Who went home on The Golden Bachelorette this week?

It seems like the frontrunners are emerging, and the guys who haven’t had one bit of dialogue all episode are probably heading out. But you never know with this show!

OMG, are those only FOUR roses on the table? That can’t be right. Is that right? I guess she did give out three date roses, so that adds up. Wow, we’re quickly approaching the end of this show, and it feels like we just started!

The first rose goes to Pascal.

The remaining ones are given to:

• Jonathan
• Mark

Jesse shows up for the first time in this episode to tell us it’s the final rose of the night. And it’s going to…Keith.

That means we’re saying goodbye to Charles, Gary, Dan, and Gil. Awww, Charles! He says this experience helped him pull himself out of his sadness and says he found “a different kind of love” on the show. All the guys head outside to say one more goodbye to their friends. Stop, I’m crying! This is too sweet! 

With such charmers, I’m at a loss for who Joan’s going to pick in the end. But you know I’ll share my predictions as they pop up.