ChatGPT could easily draft my annual medical chart: seven bouts of diarrhea, five sciatica flare-ups, two sinus infections, and one mosquito bite treated as if it required an airlift to the Mayo Clinic. (Look, it was very itchy, okay?)
I know, I know. ChatGPT isn’t a real doctor. It reminded me of that fact almost every time I asked it a health-related question. Even OpenAI CEO Sam Altman reminded me of that when we spoke — though he also admitted he uses it all the time to ask about his baby son’s health and his own. “I ask every medical question about my child to ChatGPT,” he said. “I don’t necessarily make the decision that way, but it is the first thing I check.”
Same. I asked ChatGPT about every weird symptom, late-night panic, and confusing test result I encountered this year. Anytime someone in the house wasn’t feeling great — even the dog — I went straight to Dr. GPT. Below is a log of some of the most interesting exchanges. The answers have been edited for length. In some cases, I even told ChatGPT: “All of that, but shorter. Pretend you’re a real doctor — minus the terrible handwriting.”
Privacy experts would say what I did here was a horrible, terrible, no-good idea — especially if I shared any sensitive information with the chatbot. They’re right. There’s a lot of potential risk in handing over medical records to giant tech companies. Beyond the obvious exposure of personal data, there’s the chance that information could be hacked, used to train future models, or used to increase insurance rates.
I made a few exceptions for the sake of the experiment, but I also practiced good chatbot hygiene. I cropped or blurred out any test results or doctor-patient correspondence that included personal identifiers — things like my address, date of birth, or Social Security number. I also turned off the settings in Google’s Gemini, OpenAI’s ChatGPT, and Anthropic’s Claude that allow chat history to be used for training data.
January
I have another sinus infection, or at least it feels like I do. What can I do to prevent these?
DR. GPT: Ugh, another sinus infection — so frustrating. To prevent these recurring sinus infections, keep your sinuses moist with daily saline rinses and use a humidifier. A saline nasal spray or rinse (like a neti pot) can especially help during cold/dry seasons. Manage allergies with antihistamines or nasal steroids, and avoid irritants like smoke or strong fragrances. Stay hydrated, support your immune system with good sleep and diet, and see an ENT if infections are frequent — you may have structural issues or chronic inflammation.
ROBO-DOC REPORT CARD RATING: 9/10
Spot on. It correctly predicted the results of my visit to an ear, nose, and throat doctor, who prescribed almost the exact neti-pot-plus-nasal-steroid routine. The ENT did add a CAT scan (no blockages). Bedside manner bonus points: The chatbot even tossed in an “ugh, so frustrating,” which felt oddly comforting coming from a machine.
February
I’m having the usual bad pain on my left side, by my butt. What should I do?
DR. GPT: If it hurts when you press on it and you’ve been sitting a lot, it’s likely a muscle issue — possibly a strain or piriformis syndrome, where a tight muscle in your butt presses on the sciatic nerve. If the pain is sharp or shoots down your leg, it could be sciatica, caused by irritation of that same nerve, often from too much sitting or pressure on your lower back. Either way, try stretching (pull your knee toward the opposite shoulder), heat or ice, and massage with a foam roller or tennis ball.
ROBO-DOC REPORT CARD RATING: 7/10
Strong diagnosis. It confirmed sciatica from my book-writing desk marathon and prescribed stretching, which worked. But unlike a human doctor, Dr. GPT skipped the deeper spine-and-nerve explanation and didn’t suggest any other pain relief.
March
You are a vet. My Cavapoo, Browser, has been diagnosed with chronic valve disease (CVD). He is being put on pimobendan. How many more years might he live?
DR. GPT: Dogs with early-stage CVD and mild heart enlargement can live for years, especially when treated with pimobendan, which has been shown to delay heart failure by fifteen months or more. Once dogs progress to heart failure, life expectancy typically ranges from six months to two years, depending on treatment and overall health. Small breeds like Cavapoos often have better outcomes. Early diagnosis, medication, and regular monitoring can significantly improve both lifespan and quality of life. By starting Browser on pimobendan early and monitoring his condition closely, you’re already taking steps that are proven to extend his life and improve its quality.
ROBO-DOC REPORT CARD RATING: 6/10
Dr. GPT’s advice lined up closely with what the vet said and even encouraged me that we’d taken the right steps. But unlike the human vet, the chatbot threw in a weird “year range” prognosis that no actual professional vet we had talked to would actually give.
April
I have had a bad smell in my nose all day. Any idea what it could be?
DR. GPT: Yeah, that can be super annoying. It could be a sinus infection or postnasal drip messing with your sense of smell. Dental issues like infections or cavities can do it, too. Sometimes it’s phantosmia — basically a smell hallucination from colds, allergies, or stress. Or, less likely but still possible, something’s stuck up there.
ROBO-DOC REPORT CARD RATING: 7/10
Ding, ding! The chatbot’s first suggestion was correct. It was another sinus infection and a sinus rinse was the winning move, and it worked. But Dr. GPT also tossed out a few extra possibilities that made me second-guess myself. Bedside manner bonus: calling the condition “super annoying.”
May
I’ve been having diarrhea and some stomach cramps. I just started a new medication, but also, the kids have been sick. Could it be related?
DR. GPT: It could be the medication. Can you tell me more about it? Some other possibilities: a stomach bug (viral gastroenteritis), something you ate (food poisoning, intolerance), reaction to another medication, or underlying GI issues like IBS or gallbladder problems. If the pain is severe, you can’t stay hydrated, you have a fever, or the diarrhea lasts more than a couple of days, then it’s worth calling your doctor ASAP. They might want to rule out anything more serious or adjust your dosage.
ROBO-DOC REPORT CARD RATING: 5/10
Eventually, Dr. GPT landed on the right call (stomach bug, not meds), and bland food plus water worked. But the flood of other suggestions left me a little uncertain, even after a long back-and-forth we had. At least the chatbot was appropriately cautious about when to call a doctor.
June
Can you look at the attached photo? It’s a really bad bug bite that I’ve had for about five days. It’s very warm and itchy. A friend thinks it’s cellulitis. What do you think?
DR. GPT: It could be a possibility, but I can’t diagnose it for sure. If it’s warm, swollen, or painful, definitely get it checked out by a doctor just to rule out anything serious. Better to be on the safe side! In the meantime, you could try a cold compress, hydrocortisone cream, and antihistamine.
ROBO-DOC REPORT CARD RATING: 6/10
It was, in fact, just a bug bite. A cold compress did the trick. The advice was obvious and a little thin, but at least it didn’t send me into a panic — or waste energy pretending to care.
September
Attached are the results of my breast MRI. I’m confused — do they want me to have one or two biopsies?
DR. GPT: The report recommends a biopsy on the right breast. The right upper outer quadrant area, and MRI-guided biopsy is specifically recommended. For the other right-sided finding, they want to do ultrasound first. If the ultrasound doesn’t clearly explain the MRI finding, then biopsy would be the next step. So, bottom line: You’ll definitely need at least one biopsy (right breast, MRI-guided) and possibly more depending on what the ultrasound shows. Do you want me to lay this out as a step-by-step “what happens next” plan so it’s easier to follow?
ROBO-DOC REPORT CARD RATING: 10/10
Dr. GPT parsed a complicated report faster (and more accurately) than my real doctor, who took twenty-four hours to call back and then misread it. The explanation was clear, simple, and to the point, as well as straightforward and neutral in tone —which, honestly, I needed.
November
My son has a very sore throat, a 101-degree fever, and a stomachache. Any ideas?
DR. GPT: Not a doctor, but here are some possibilities based on those symptoms: Strep throat (classic signs include sore throat, fever like 101, and sometimes stomach pain, especially in kids). Viral infection could be adenovirus or enterovirus. Flu if body aches kick in. COVID is still circulating. That sore throat + fever + stomach pain in a kid = strep test territory. I’d take him in for a quick strep swab.
ROBO-DOC REPORT CARD RATING: 6/10
I was convinced it was strep. ChatGPT’s top guess was also strep. The pediatrician took one look and said, nope, it was hand, foot, and mouth disease, which is caused by coxsackievirus. To its credit, ChatGPT had also floated “enterovirus,” which is exactly what hand, foot, and mouth disease is.
From the book: I AM NOT A ROBOT by Joanna Stern. Copyright © 2026 by Joanna Stern. Reprinted courtesy of Harper, an imprint of HarperCollins Publishers.
